One Really Important Parenting Strategy that Makes You Like Your Kids More

Letting your kids choose their own path is a terrible idea

At a Maple Leafs game with the family — photo by author

My childhood memories of my parents are mostly that they were wonderful people who yelled at me a lot because they wanted to make me into a better human. But we didn’t hang out. Later in life we became friends and I’m happy that it worked out that way, but the path could have been smoothed a little bit.

I’ve heard all the parenting advice about letting your kids choose their own path. It’s bullshit. At least, don’t start with that. Start by encouraging your kids to like the things you like. If they reject it, fine, let them choose their own path, but while they’re young, before they become brooding teenagers, they want to be like you and emulate you. You have a golden ten years to engage them, and then the opportunities start to decline.

Why do you want to engage them? I’m glad you asked.

It’s so you enjoy the time you spend with them more. And if you enjoy it more, you’ll spend more time with them.

I’m no saint as a parent. When my kids were toddlers I thought they were annoying as fuck and thank god for my wife and a series of nannies who got us…